nerd_mosh

Things went from awesome to shiity and now back up to somewhat awesome again. yeah, fuck you lj

We both pretend to be friends, but we both know our alternative motives. Know this, your my enemy, im not holding back, and i will defeat you.

I havent updated this boisk in awhile, ive been going out of town every weekend, i like doing that, its kinda like my escape or something? i had the best weekend ive ever had in a long time, got mad drunk, hung out, snugged. i recently discovered last.fm and it rules, i have like 30 artists, and it just cycles through all of em and just plays a random song, helps my day go by so much quicker. i think im gonna cut down on the weed smoke a lil, i forget what being sober feels like. Ive lost 10lbs recently and im stoked on that, im getting a membership to the gym this friday when i get paid, can not wait to start working out again, im almost done with skate 2, i really miss teh warcraftz, i havent played in about 2 months, need to step it up. Work is going good, my boss told me that if i keep going like this that im def gonna make it far with hopkins and all. I think i might even start school back up next semester and finally get my Mass Communications: Production and announcing degree. Lulz, itll look good on a wall for my parents i guess, Plaugeland goes into the studio in i think like 3 weeks? next two weekends are gonna rule, katsucon and the mongos show on monday, then i got e-town, then recording the next weekend. 3 weeks without seeing that chick that i like a lil bit, oh wellz. I finished 30 rock season 2 and weeds season 4, love having on demand and netflix, i never miss anything. Anyway, im stoked to be alive, i got goals and a way to meet all of them hopefully. Peace out.

It seems like i got everything i could possibly want or need right now, and then something like this happens, my head is fucked like 10 ways from sunday, if you know me and your close to me, you know whats up, and again, if you know me, you know this is fucking my head more than anything in the fucking world ever has. I know the decision ill make, but its just now if im gonna give my self the chance to. Im making no fucking sense, i have to go into work today for my 90 day evaluation, lets see how this one goes....

i dont even know what to write in here today, im like a mixed up mess recently. i kinda had a crazy weekend where i did alot of bad stuff, but im not doing said bad stuff anymore, or for a very long time. My mind is constantly wondering recently, like ill day dream all day and look down, all my work will be done and itll be time to go. i almost left work early today cuz i felt like death, but im pretty sure ive become lactose intolerant and i drank some milk today. fuck my life. Subject change. For a really long time ive felt like there was a void in my life, that i needed to have a girl friend, that i needed to have someone to call my own. and recently, i feel like that voids gone, theres no girl in mah life, theres no promise of one, just good friends, good times and keeping my mind focused on what i want. Im meeting new people, strengthening alot of friendships, and realizing how cool alot of people are that i normally would have just shrugged off. Im not locking myself in my house 24/7 anymore, im having a blast, come on summer.

ps. watch: Run fat boy run, the simon pegg movie, shit had me lollin.

my body is extremely angry with me. theres gotta be a change in my life soon, something real. Im tired of the ups the downs, the head games and the mind fucks. This weekend ruled though, and by this weekend i mean seeing out to win in a lil room ruled. I was only awake for a total of 6 hours yesterday. I plan on not doing a thing when i get home just get fucked up, lay in bed, appraise my comic books, and watch tv.
 

Im getting pretty freaking tired of all these back and forth games, the mind fucks and the head games, something real needs to come along.

2008 is almost over, its been a fucking crazy year, a fresh start sounds good to me, and im sure everyone can agree, its been quite a rough year. I need to catch up on some sleep tomorrow or tonight, which i probaly wont do cuz ive been playing fable 2 and its finally gettin good. I have to close, scan and file about 2000 work orders today before i get to leave, not to enthused bout that one. I got my new car, i like it, its wiggertastic. i dont think i use lj right, everyone else always has these profound thoughts, or actual reasons for posting what they do, i just post what comes to my mind and its just one big paragraph that no one will read. Sometimes i over think things, some times i underthink them, but right now, my mind as clouded and fucked up as it might be, is pretty clear and theres not really any distractions, work, video games, sleep, party, hardcccccoreeeee. And if a cute babe comes along, then she'll go in there too, but im pretty content with life.

Sanity?? Nah. Not this week.

Posted via LiveJournal.app.

theres an x-mas party at work, im hiding in my office with the lights out, till its over. So much shit is off my shoulders now, it looks like ms. krunk will be moving into jesses room when he leaves, im so stoked, shes the best room mate someone could ask for. So i kinda had a moment last night at like 3am when i was trying to sleep (and never succeeding really). My life is completely different from where i thought it would be like 4 years ago I thought id have a degree by now, still be edge, proably married to that one chick, and like be living with my parents still barely working with my film degree. I got a townhouse in dundalk, I work at hopkins, and christi krunk a girl i did not like back then at all is my room mate. Love life. so stoked to go the champ tommorow, i wanna go to the dirtmall before and buy some things for my parents for x-mas. I love my friends, i love the way things have panned out, i wouldnt do things any different.

Im in the best mood ive been in a long time this past week, and you know what, its not cause of anybody but myself. For the first time in a long time im happy with where i am. Art space tonight. Stoked.

Everyones getting an lj again so i figured id join in, so much stuff going on my life, but i cant help but smile everyday at how my life was going down the tubes less than 2 months ago and now shits finally picking back up, working is taking up alot of my time these days, but i love my job, i listen to music, get all my work done and just fuck around on the computer until a lil more work comes in.

Ive been raging alot recently, dont remember my weekends for the most part, its kinda scary. Christi said friday and saturday both times when i came home i looked fucked up outta my mind.

Speakin of that...christi is gonna be an official room mate to the mcveigh del haven house come jan. jesse is moving out and christi is moving from the couch to a real room and bed. The house looks like a house since she moved in, freakin rules.